How to Tell If You’re a Group Rat

[tweetmeme only_single=false source=”artofgroupride”] A Group Rat is similar to the concept of the gym rat. Except replace all those hours spent inside a stuffy gym, replace with the great outdoors, add that beautiful piece of engineering called the bicycle, and stir in a healthy dose of riding with the group and you’ve got yourself the cycling version of the gym rat: the Group Rat.

Take this simple test to determine if you’re a Group Rat. Add up your acquired points. If none of the 3 statements describe you, take zero points. You’ll score it at the end. This is an entirely scientific process.

Question #1: The least amount of sleep I need before an early morning Group Ride is:

  1. 8 hours (1 point)
  2. 6 hours (2 points)
  3. I sleep for a few minutes on the trainer so I can get a good warm up before the Group Ride (3 points)
    Question #2: The earliest I would get up for a Group Ride is:
    1. 7:00am (1 point)
    2. 5:00am (2 points)
    3. I get up before I go to sleep (3 points)
    Question #3: Before a Group Ride, I eat:
    1. Oatmeal, a bagel with sausage egg and cheese, and waffles (1 point)
    2. Toast and a pop tart (2 points)
    3. I eat the night before so I don’t have to eat in the morning ensuring I’m not late to the roll-out (3 points)
    Question #4: The minimum number of Group Ride miles I get in per week is:
    1. 50 (1 point)
    2. 150 (2 points)
    3. 300+ (3 points)
    Question #5: My preferred toast/bagel spread is:
    1. Jam (1 point)
    2. Peanut Butter (2 points)
    3. Nutella (3 points)
    Question #6: Which statement best describes your attention to training mileage:
    1. I don’t keep track of training miles (1 point)
    2. I track training miles in a notebook or spreadsheet (2 points)
    3. I download power and heart rate data daily and post to a blog or email to my coach (3 points)
    Question #7: When I arrive at the Group Ride meet-up location, I typically:
    1. Quietly take my place at the back of the line (1 point)
    2. Roll immediately to the front and yell, “Alright Freds, who’s ready to suffer? Roll out!” (2 points)
    3. Roll up to a friend near the front of the group and chat (3 points)
    Question #8: If the Group Ride is faster or slower than typical, I would:
    1. Sit in (1 point)
    2. Go sit on the front immediately and set the appropriate tempo (2 points)
    3. Roll through the front and quip, “Where’s the fire?” or “Must be a recovery day.” (3 points)
    Question #9: If someone in the Group Ride punctures, I make it a rule to:
    1. Let the group determine my reaction. If the group stops, I stop (1 point)
    2. Attack (2 points)
    3. Call out, “Flat!” and wait for others to stop. If a good friend punctures, I definitely stop (3 points)

    Question #10: At the coffee shop at the end of the Group Ride, I usually:

    1. Hang out for a few minutes then head to work (1 point)
    2. Sprint to the front of the line because I’m fast everywhere (2 points)
    3. Buy coffee for a few fellow riders, sit and chat (3 points)


    0-8 points – You do know that we’re talking about riding bicycles, right?
    8-12 points – You’ve done some Group Rides but not too regularly.
    12-18 points – You like Group Rides a lot, you probably hang out with Group Rats, but you’re not there yet.
    18-28 points – You’re definitely a Group Rat.
    28-30 points – You’re a HUGE Group Rat. You may also have some life priorities out of whack.

    I scored a 22 – middle of the Group Rat pack. How did you do? Leave a comment and let me know.

    Ride on…


2 responses

  1. bruce

    14 – almost there… haha!

    February 7, 2011 at 8:56 am

    • The Art of the Group Ride

      Go out and get some Nutella! 🙂

      February 7, 2011 at 5:01 pm

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